V_V Help meh.... Plz?

[physco kid]

I am having problems. I guess my brain is still attached to my past considering the bad part of it. Now the problem is no matter how much I try to let go it comes back and slowly eats me alive. I am still having problems knowing who to trust and who not to. I still have social problems, other words I am the Ultimate version of shy. I cant look people in the eye,or even look at people period.
Any little comfort or advice you'd like to give?

[RockPillow®]

Have you seen a therapist?

[mystichuntress]

It's easier to talk to old friends, maybe? Someone who has known you for a while and will never turn their back on you.
Truthfully, I think therapists are pointless. As are counsellors. But yeah, maybe you could go and see someone.
Or if you have a brother or sister, you can talk to them.

It's ok if you're really really shy. Most of my friends are shy...I guess it's because I'm that type of person who just has to look after them because I can't help it. One of my friends even compares me to her mum >.< So no matter that you're shy - someone who can pick up on that will want to talk to you.

[physco kid]

Have you seen a therapist?

Yes >_> She didn't do nothing but make me uncomfortable and that I am one of those 'Special' mental cases (Shh I know I am a partial one )

It's easier to talk to old friends, maybe? Someone who has known you for a while and will never turn their back on you.
Truthfully, I think therapists are pointless. As are counsellors. But yeah, maybe you could go and see someone.
Or if you have a brother or sister, you can talk to them.

It's ok if you're really really shy. Most of my friends are shy...I guess it's because I'm that type of person who just has to look after them because I can't help it. One of my friends even compares me to her mum >.< So no matter that you're shy - someone who can pick up on that will want to talk to you.

Agreed. Last therapist didnt help She didnt help me. My brother saw her to and she didnt help >_>(He was a REAL mental case). I have actually had no real friends or any old ones and I am unsure if I got one real friend. I am almost an only child. My brother he is 8 years older then me and he moved out of the house when I was 8. He was a creep but I loved him . He is a sociopath . He always gave me nightmares In the very few time I got to know him and he lived near me. O.0 . I have had been compared to a girls mom before (Had a first grader for a friend.she threw a knife. So Yeaaah I never went near to her again.) I gave advice even though I am in need for it 90% of the time. I know its true ^_^ The girl I met is very bubbly so she got curious of me we got to know each other ish.

[KRSTYSTLCLR]

PK, It seems like you have had something traumatic happen. Without going into detail, maybe just say yes or no.
Also you keep saying that you are psycho or crazy etc. But you don't come off that way on the net. More like lonely. Do you journal? Have you read any self help books? I can recommend Chicken Soup for the Teenagers Soul. I think being a teenager anywhere in this day and age is tough. Even my kids went through having those false friends that just get to know your business and then set you up and stab you in the back, so I can understand why you don't really have a good trustworthy friend, especially since you have had to move a lot. My tip for today is to remember that having friends is nice, but family is everything.

[physco kid]

PK, It seems like you have had something traumatic happen. Without going into detail, maybe just say yes or no.
Also you keep saying that you are psycho or crazy etc. But you don't come off that way on the net. More like lonely. Do you journal? Have you read any self help books? I can recommend Chicken Soup for the Teenagers Soul. I think being a teenager anywhere in this day and age is tough. Even my kids went through having those false friends that just get to know your business and then set you up and stab you in the back, so I can understand why you don't really have a good trustworthy friend, especially since you have had to move a lot. My tip for today is to remember that having friends is nice, but family is everything.

Yes .(If bullies count and they surrounded you in a never ending tide)-_-. I have gone off the rail a bit and I feel insane. Like no one knows me and that I am in my own little mind hugging myself in a corner.Hurting everyone who becomes too close to me or scaring people away. I am lonely also and I dont know how to talk to people face to face >-< Without feeling like a creep for looking at them while talking. I used to journal never made me feel great after so I just stopped altogether.>_< Hey I read that last yr! The chicken soup for the soul for teenagers! I know my grama bought me it after she heard that I have been suicidal >-<. Just lost the book dunno what happen to it . If you are not popular at school and hated then yeah it becomes tough. School becomes the social class and quite literally. If you dont know how to socialize you get eaten alive from loneliness and get depression.(So far Severe for me) I have had all false friends not a real one so I dont know If I trust my friend or keep the barrier up? Ha my family is getting spread apart. Along with me and Ty ^_^

[KRSTYSTLCLR]

PK,

I think you will be ok. I hope you reconsider talking to a counselor or therapist. You need to break this cycle of mistrust somehow. Try looking for a therapist that specialized in trauma. I think you may have better luck as they know not to play the mindgame BS that cognitive therapists seem to like.

Good Luck and don't you ever give up!

[physco kid]

PK,

I think you will be ok. I hope you reconsider talking to a counselor or therapist. You need to break this cycle of mistrust somehow. Try looking for a therapist that specialized in trauma. I think you may have better luck as they know not to play the mindgame BS that cognitive therapists seem to like.

Good Luck and don't you ever give up!

I will be ok in future. If we ever get enough money we can try ones from here. -_- Since the town I was in was full of idiots to the Brim. I just need to let go of the past. Which seems impossible since it haunts me in every which way . I don't know how to break this mistrust cycle which is a problem I've tried to work on. I need to talk to a social counselor I guess also?!?! since I have social problems. Like talking to people face to face (or even phone V_V). Would there be Therapists (in trauma) who also see children-young adults? That would be my question ^-^. I know there is for adults but what about children? And Ty ^~^

[MonSTAR]

I know this sounds really after-school-ish, but have you tried joining a club or a sport? If there's something you like to do, chances are if you get with a group of people who like to do similar activities you'll find you have more things in common. It's a nice way to make acquaintances and slowly develop the friendship with each group meeting or practice.

[litlep]

Hey PK

I don't really have any advice except what everyone else is suggesting butI want you to know I know excactly how you feel. I am extremely shy also and it does get quite depressing.

Although I'm not quite as bad as you with the whole depression thing, poor you, but still, I'd like you to know your not alone

[Diclonius]

As far as being shy I've always had problems being shy. I can type up a storm to people online but when it comes to face-to-face I'm always silent. What really helped me was getting my job and being promoted, the fast-food business makes you have to learn to deal with a lot of people. I still have problems talking to my co-workers, I hate telling people what to do and when I try to it almost comes out like a question "Could you please do this? If not it's ok" kind of stuff. But before I wouldn't have even been able to get that far.

You just have to keep pushing yourself. Join a group or something, a sport's team or a class for something you want to learn, ANYTHING with other people that will eventually require you to talk to them. You kind of have to force yourself into it and gradually it'll start to get better.

[physco kid]

I know this sounds really after-school-ish, but have you tried joining a club or a sport? If there's something you like to do, chances are if you get with a group of people who like to do similar activities you'll find you have more things in common. It's a nice way to make acquaintances and slowly develop the friendship with each group meeting or practice.

So far no clubs I havent seen ^~^ I do try to look for games to join in. Problem is no one here seems do to my kind of interest >-< I am draw more sonic characters while everyone else draws anime. I am really bad at it.>_< I am still looking. Ty on reply ^~^

Hey PK

I don't really have any advice except what everyone else is suggesting butI want you to know I know excactly how you feel. I am extremely shy also and it does get quite depressing.

Although I'm not quite as bad as you with the whole depression thing, poor you, but still, I'd like you to know your not alone

Not a fan of sympathy... Ty. and the depression I guess is just from collapsing into myself from the horrid town >_< so it messed me socially.
^~^ Ty on reply.

As far as being shy I've always had problems being shy. I can type up a storm to people online but when it comes to face-to-face I'm always silent. What really helped me was getting my job and being promoted, the fast-food business makes you have to learn to deal with a lot of people. I still have problems talking to my co-workers, I hate telling people what to do and when I try to it almost comes out like a question "Could you please do this? If not it's ok" kind of stuff. But before I wouldn't have even been able to get that far.

You just have to keep pushing yourself. Join a group or something, a sport's team or a class for something you want to learn, ANYTHING with other people that will eventually require you to talk to them. You kind of have to force yourself into it and gradually it'll start to get better.

I have been trying to find some clubs as I told MonSTAR. Not alot of people seem to share interests over here. So I am Thinking of trying to learn anime. Its gonna be one heck of a pain -_- Since that's what people seem to draw here more. Should be interesting. Thats how I would sound if I was made a leader in a class group Something that 'll require me to talk to people.... hmm... Ty on reply ^~^ That might actually give me an idea.

[mystichuntress]

what interests do you have?
You play the flute did you say? Join the school orchestra or woodwind ensemble or jazz band. That's always a nice way to meet people and practise.

And you recently moved to a new town? Or have you moved for a while now? (I haven't had time to read the replies).
The good thing about moving is that no one knows who you are so you can be completely diferent! And no one will know!

Push yourself. I joined the student council even though I hate public speaking.
I also volunteered to be a school librarian because it's a good opportunity to meet people and help them out. (sort of like your job in the fast-food industry)

I think maybe, do you have a problem with what other people think of you?

[physco kid]

what interests do you have?
You play the flute did you say? Join the school orchestra or woodwind ensemble or jazz band. That's always a nice way to meet people and practise.

And you recently moved to a new town? Or have you moved for a while now? (I haven't had time to read the replies).
The good thing about moving is that no one knows who you are so you can be completely diferent! And no one will know!

Push yourself. I joined the student council even though I hate public speaking.
I also volunteered to be a school librarian because it's a good opportunity to meet people and help them out. (sort of like your job in the fast-food industry)

I think maybe, do you have a problem with what other people think of you?

I do play flute even though I burnt myself out like an idiot Even though I played it barely for 6 months I am going to be doing that when I get to seventh but I am in band. Not jazz yet I have moved to this town for about for 7 months so I am newish still. Since I still havent met everyone(since I am in a small town)! I am trying to paint a new picture of me in this town. so far I got Lonely and stranger . But it was nice to get this chance to move and small op! ^~^ Hmm still learning this towns ropes so I dont know any clubs I can join. Or any that Involve speaking. I do have a problem with what people think of me. Where hence thats the part still of my past sticking to me like glue >_<

[The Atomic Mango]

your "past" isn't really anything special. every kid was bullied. i've known kids who were bullied constantly, and they get right back up. so why can't you? you ask for help, but you don't follow advice. FORGET THE PAST. just do it. it's seriously the only way. nothing else works, besides revenge (don't do that). live in the present. not the past. bullies aren't worth reminiscing about.

yes, i'm pissed. pisses me off when i see people whine about little shit like this and not simply get over it. it's almost as if they're whoring for attention.

also, you say you're ugly. whyyyyy?! is that what bullies told you? they tell that to literally everybody. maybe you're chubby, zitty, boyish, bland, i don't know. all of that is fixable. lose body fat, wash yourself properly, dress girly and get a fitting haircut and wear a push up bra if you need it, or wear makeup. it's NOT THAT HARD TO LOOK PRETTY. i've known girls who have gotten their faces fucked up in car crashes, and with some reconstruction surgery or just makeup, they look PRETTY. so what is your excuse?!

one more thing. your parents are supportive. get their help if you really need it. i think you do. my parents were not supportive. they were the exact opposite of supportive. they were practically bullies living in my home. never once did i complain about bullying, despite having it much worse than you. of course, it did result in odd neuroses, but i got over them. if i had had proper help, then i could've gotten over it a lot sooner.

don't respond with "thanks", a rant, or some stupid shit. PLEASE just follow my advice.

[RockPillow®]

Have you seen a therapist?

Yes >_> She didn't do nothing but make me uncomfortable and that I am one of those 'Special' mental cases (Shh I know I am a partial one )

You probably made yourself feel uncomfortable. Sounds like you need to discipline yourself in some way. You should look into picking up a sport and joining a team or dedicate yourself to learning how to play an instrument.

[physco kid]

Have you seen a therapist?

Yes >_> She didn't do nothing but make me uncomfortable and that I am one of those 'Special' mental cases (Shh I know I am a partial one )

You probably made yourself feel uncomfortable. Sounds like you need to discipline yourself in some way. You should look into picking up a sport and joining a team or dedicate yourself to learning how to play an instrument.

I personally dont know anymore. It wouldnt impossible. I am learning to play the flute. I am thinking on Martial arts. I would gain self discipline. *Shrugs*

[RockPillow®]

Have you seen a therapist?

Yes >_> She didn't do nothing but make me uncomfortable and that I am one of those 'Special' mental cases (Shh I know I am a partial one )

You probably made yourself feel uncomfortable. Sounds like you need to discipline yourself in some way. You should look into picking up a sport and joining a team or dedicate yourself to learning how to play an instrument.

I personally dont know anymore. It wouldnt impossible. I am learning to play the flute. I am thinking on Martial arts. I would gain self discipline. *Shrugs*

*shrugs* Maybe it'll take growing up into this world of growing chaos for you to gain self-discipline.

[mystichuntress]

what interests do you have?
You play the flute did you say? Join the school orchestra or woodwind ensemble or jazz band. That's always a nice way to meet people and practise.

And you recently moved to a new town? Or have you moved for a while now? (I haven't had time to read the replies).
The good thing about moving is that no one knows who you are so you can be completely diferent! And no one will know!

Push yourself. I joined the student council even though I hate public speaking.
I also volunteered to be a school librarian because it's a good opportunity to meet people and help them out. (sort of like your job in the fast-food industry)

I think maybe, do you have a problem with what other people think of you?

I do play flute even though I burnt myself out like an idiot Even though I played it barely for 6 months I am going to be doing that when I get to seventh but I am in band. Not jazz yet I have moved to this town for about for 7 months so I am newish still. Since I still havent met everyone(since I am in a small town)! I am trying to paint a new picture of me in this town. so far I got Lonely and stranger . But it was nice to get this chance to move and small op! ^~^ Hmm still learning this towns ropes so I dont know any clubs I can join. Or any that Involve speaking. I do have a problem with what people think of me. Where hence thats the part still of my past sticking to me like glue >_<

Ahh see, that's the thing!
I used to worry about what people thought of me, too up until I started high school and I realised I knew only 2 people in my class.
The thing to remember is: What other people think is their opinion. Everyone is entitled to their opinions. Whatever you do, however you try to act, there is always going to be that one person who will not like you. And that's fine! Once I realised I cannot please everyone, I chose the people who I WANT to pleasae and to HELL with the others who don't like my attitude. In doing that, I got over my shyness and now I even argue with the teacher, just for the sake of it. Of course, in doing so, I'm not exactly the well-liked person in my class, but there are many who respect me because I choose to be who I am without letting the bitches try and make me conform and put me down.

[physco kid]

what interests do you have?
You play the flute did you say? Join the school orchestra or woodwind ensemble or jazz band. That's always a nice way to meet people and practise.

And you recently moved to a new town? Or have you moved for a while now? (I haven't had time to read the replies).
The good thing about moving is that no one knows who you are so you can be completely diferent! And no one will know!

Push yourself. I joined the student council even though I hate public speaking.
I also volunteered to be a school librarian because it's a good opportunity to meet people and help them out. (sort of like your job in the fast-food industry)

I think maybe, do you have a problem with what other people think of you?

I do play flute even though I burnt myself out like an idiot Even though I played it barely for 6 months I am going to be doing that when I get to seventh but I am in band. Not jazz yet I have moved to this town for about for 7 months so I am newish still. Since I still havent met everyone(since I am in a small town)! I am trying to paint a new picture of me in this town. so far I got Lonely and stranger . But it was nice to get this chance to move and small op! ^~^ Hmm still learning this towns ropes so I dont know any clubs I can join. Or any that Involve speaking. I do have a problem with what people think of me. Where hence thats the part still of my past sticking to me like glue >_<

Ahh see, that's the thing!
I used to worry about what people thought of me, too up until I started high school and I realised I knew only 2 people in my class.
The thing to remember is: What other people think is their opinion. Everyone is entitled to their opinions. Whatever you do, however you try to act, there is always going to be that one person who will not like you. And that's fine! Once I realised I cannot please everyone, I chose the people who I WANT to pleasae and to HELL with the others who don't like my attitude. In doing that, I got over my shyness and now I even argue with the teacher, just for the sake of it. Of course, in doing so, I'm not exactly the well-liked person in my class, but there are many who respect me because I choose to be who I am without letting the bitches try and make me conform and put me down.

I try not to. I end up groveling to please someone I guess I would be a natural pushover? I know it 'll take me a while to get it through my thick skull =_= since I know it logically but not emotionally I guess. DX I guess on my list to work on things!!!! You argue with the teacher? dont think for those teachers you would be a fave Ty on reply . *Snickers* still funny

[mystichuntress]

Oh no, arguing with the teacher is fun! He said stuff like "all rectangles are trapeziums" so I aruged that all equilateral triangles are also isosceles triangles....Then there's the one where my socks were wet (I stepped in a puddle) and I needed to dry them.
I only argue with teachers who can put up with my obnoxiousness. (is that a word?)

hmmm....well, I suppose making a list of things to do is a good idea. I should do that, too. So what's first on your list?

[physco kid]

Oh no, arguing with the teacher is fun! He said stuff like "all rectangles are trapeziums" so I aruged that all equilateral triangles are also isosceles triangles....Then there's the one where my socks were wet (I stepped in a puddle) and I needed to dry them.
I only argue with teachers who can put up with my obnoxiousness. (is that a word?)

hmmm....well, I suppose making a list of things to do is a good idea. I should do that, too. So what's first on your list?

So far taking top is getting over my social probs

Ha I rarely find anything to argue on ! Maybe I should look more

[mystichuntress]

You have to be specific than just your "social probs"

It's not hard to find something to argue about. When the teacher says something, is there something you don't agree with? Or it could be about the work you handed in. Once, we had to do a scale drawing of an island on an A3 piece of paper. My friend, he absolutely hated the teacher (none of us liked her that much because we learnt onlly one thing from her in the whole year) and so he decided to use his "common sense". What did he do? He drew a dot in the middle of the page and on the scale, he wrote "500 billion light years". When the teacher saw it, she got really angry and started a whole argument. It was cool. ^^

[physco kid]

You have to be specific than just your "social probs"

It's not hard to find something to argue about. When the teacher says something, is there something you don't agree with? Or it could be about the work you handed in. Once, we had to do a scale drawing of an island on an A3 piece of paper. My friend, he absolutely hated the teacher (none of us liked her that much because we learnt onlly one thing from her in the whole year) and so he decided to use his "common sense". What did he do? He drew a dot in the middle of the page and on the scale, he wrote "500 billion light years". When the teacher saw it, she got really angry and started a whole argument. It was cool. ^^

To be more specific working on Me talking to people face to face ^~^(wthout tripping on myself like an idiot. what I mean, Learn to look at people and get better talking to others ).

There are some stuff I dont agree on especially work . I have only done this to others my age. Never a teacher I am sure its fun and who won the teacher or your friend?

[mystichuntress]

Yeah, it can be hard to talk to someone face-to-face. But you don't always have to look at someone when you talk to them. You can look at them for a second or two, look away, fiddle with your watch, look at the scenery, look at their face again etc.
It's okay, when I speak, I trip over myself sometimes as well. It's not really that bad. In year 8, I was presenting my speech and I dropped my cue cards 3 times. Imagine that. Then in year 10, I did a speech with a lot of confidence, I even jumped about and did actions and stuff i.e. miming a shootout.

Who won? Well, the teacher did. She took his work, screwed it up and threw it in the bin - even though it could still be reused. He didn't really care, though.
I had an argument with the music teacher, once. She was a substitute for the day. I said something at the beginning of class, and she hated me for the whole of it. She would yell at me, turn to write notes on the board, then turn around and yell at me some more.

[physco kid]

Yeah, it can be hard to talk to someone face-to-face. But you don't always have to look at someone when you talk to them. You can look at them for a second or two, look away, fiddle with your watch, look at the scenery, look at their face again etc.
It's okay, when I speak, I trip over myself sometimes as well. It's not really that bad. In year 8, I was presenting my speech and I dropped my cue cards 3 times. Imagine that. Then in year 10, I did a speech with a lot of confidence, I even jumped about and did actions and stuff i.e. miming a shootout.

Who won? Well, the teacher did. She took his work, screwed it up and threw it in the bin - even though it could still be reused. He didn't really care, though.
I had an argument with the music teacher, once. She was a substitute for the day. I said something at the beginning of class, and she hated me for the whole of it. She would yell at me, turn to write notes on the board, then turn around and yell at me some more.

>_< Ah yes (it dont help I never learned to socialize properly >-<) I just dont seem like the everyday 12 yr old either which bugs me on it. > - < Really? You seem like your more outgoing and willing to go out that far. the cue card remind me of my grama if I remember right she lost them so she had to remember it on spot?

Why would she continue to write the notes but not fulfill the argument. Ah sounds like my old teachers Plenty of the kids argued with the teachers and I got to watch The end its usually the teachers but I have seen one actually beat the teacher If I remember it was over a word like how the teacher spelled it. One of the others grabbed a dictionary and looked it up to find the teacher spelled to word wrong She was not happy

[alteredmind]

your "past" isn't really anything special. every kid was bullied. i've known kids who were bullied constantly, and they get right back up. so why can't you? you ask for help, but you don't follow advice. FORGET THE PAST. just do it. it's seriously the only way. nothing else works, besides revenge (don't do that). live in the present. not the past. bullies aren't worth reminiscing about.

yes, i'm pissed. pisses me off when i see people whine about little shit like this and not simply get over it. it's almost as if they're whoring for attention.

also, you say you're ugly. whyyyyy?! is that what bullies told you? they tell that to literally everybody. maybe you're chubby, zitty, boyish, bland, i don't know. all of that is fixable. lose body fat, wash yourself properly, dress girly and get a fitting haircut and wear a push up bra if you need it, or wear makeup. it's NOT THAT HARD TO LOOK PRETTY. i've known girls who have gotten their faces fucked up in car crashes, and with some reconstruction surgery or just makeup, they look PRETTY. so what is your excuse?!

one more thing. your parents are supportive. get their help if you really need it. i think you do. my parents were not supportive. they were the exact opposite of supportive. they were practically bullies living in my home. never once did i complain about bullying, despite having it much worse than you. of course, it did result in odd neuroses, but i got over them. if i had had proper help, then i could've gotten over it a lot sooner.

don't respond with "thanks", a rant, or some stupid shit. PLEASE just follow my advice.

don't mean to intrude but it sound's like you come from a dysfunctional family atomic mango, They exist and I don't think they should be kept hidden. Tell me, is your mother a cruel narcissist and your father a drunk? It's sad there seems to be no supportive help groups except for church groups. remember children who come from dysfunctional families have an advantage over children who do not come from dysfunctional families and that is the amazing ability to be very achievement oriented and highly successful in some ereas in there lives; they are often resilient to stress and adaptive to change. be proud that you might be one of these successful individuals regardless of your family back round.

[mystichuntress]

>_< Ah yes (it dont help I never learned to socialize properly >-<) I just dont seem like the everyday 12 yr old either which bugs me on it. > - < Really? You seem like your more outgoing and willing to go out that far. the cue card remind me of my grama if I remember right she lost them so she had to remember it on spot?

Why would she continue to write the notes but not fulfill the argument. Ah sounds like my old teachers Plenty of the kids argued with the teachers and I got to watch The end its usually the teachers but I have seen one actually beat the teacher If I remember it was over a word like how the teacher spelled it. One of the others grabbed a dictionary and looked it up to find the teacher spelled to word wrong She was not happy

Basically, the key is confidence. Be confident. If you're not confident, pretend you are. If you do that enough, you'll begin to believe you are confident. It worked for me I still chicken out at times, but then I tell myself, "Meh, what's the worse that could happen?" Well, I suppose many things could go wrong, but so what? Go for it! Trying something new is always a good confidence boost.
And don't worry about being pretty. Beauty is superficial. I couldn't care less how I look - and some people mock me for it. But even they got sick of it because they can see that I don't really care. That's what the bullies want - a reaction.

Meh, most teachers can't put up a good argument with students because they're not used to it. I remember this guy once threw a chair at the teacher because she kicked him out of the choir. And an English teacher, well, it's rumoured that in her Pump bottle is vodka and that she throws her whiteboard markers at her students - I don't want her for English this year....but apparently, she usually teaches year 12's (hopefully not me)
Yeah, I still correct my teachers when it comes to spelling and grammar. Some of them don't mind, others get pissed. Ah well.
"Don't get smart with me", they say.
"I don't need to get smart with you," I reply, "I already am smart."

[physco kid]

>_< Ah yes (it dont help I never learned to socialize properly >-<) I just dont seem like the everyday 12 yr old either which bugs me on it. > - < Really? You seem like your more outgoing and willing to go out that far. the cue card remind me of my grama if I remember right she lost them so she had to remember it on spot?

Why would she continue to write the notes but not fulfill the argument. Ah sounds like my old teachers Plenty of the kids argued with the teachers and I got to watch The end its usually the teachers but I have seen one actually beat the teacher If I remember it was over a word like how the teacher spelled it. One of the others grabbed a dictionary and looked it up to find the teacher spelled to word wrong She was not happy

Basically, the key is confidence. Be confident. If you're not confident, pretend you are. If you do that enough, you'll begin to believe you are confident. It worked for me I still chicken out at times, but then I tell myself, "Meh, what's the worse that could happen?" Well, I suppose many things could go wrong, but so what? Go for it! Trying something new is always a good confidence boost.
And don't worry about being pretty. Beauty is superficial. I couldn't care less how I look - and some people mock me for it. But even they got sick of it because they can see that I don't really care. That's what the bullies want - a reaction.

Meh, most teachers can't put up a good argument with students because they're not used to it. I remember this guy once threw a chair at the teacher because she kicked him out of the choir. And an English teacher, well, it's rumoured that in her Pump bottle is vodka and that she throws her whiteboard markers at her students - I don't want her for English this year....but apparently, she usually teaches year 12's (hopefully not me)
Yeah, I still correct my teachers when it comes to spelling and grammar. Some of them don't mind, others get pissed. Ah well.
"Don't get smart with me", they say.
"I don't need to get smart with you," I reply, "I already am smart."

Oh yes learned thats what they want. How do I cave XP ? I almost do everytime X| Hmm maybe I could work on the teacher pointing out. I know people would get confidence to from that. xD . Anything Crazy like skydiving nah XD. Anything else is what I am hanging out on and attempting to try XD. On the pretty thing I've given up on since 3rd grade XD. I dont see myself as beautiful I see me as me. I haven never minded my body much... somedays I dont like it.

This is too true XD they almost never have a good argument. Since they dont expect it. XD
O.O drunk lady.... quite scary O.0. hope you dont get her either.

[Xero.]

PK, I know you think you're in a real dark place and that you're pretty much alone in it.
Well, lots of people feel the same as you.
No, I'm not going to say so get over it.
And no, I'm not going to say "therapists and counsellors are great." I should know. I've been told some real BS by therapists. However, they are probably more helpful than you realise. Seriously, if you can get one which actually listens and knows their stuff (which most do) then you'll be in for a treat.

Social skills can be learned. Shyness can be extinguished. Personality and its traits are fluid and alter over time. Expose yourself to social situations. You will learn how to interact on a more competent level.
I'm introverted to a ridiculous level and on top of that I am socially awkward and anxious. I don't like talking to people, in general. But I do try to get over that when I'm around others. I've made some very close friends just by telling myself "let the barrier down just this once, it might be okay."
I know you're part of the Sonic fandom. That fandom is pretty big on the net, you might be able to make some pretty cool friends via that.
Hell, one of my friends who I'd known for about 4 years has recently become quite possibly my closest friend ever because we both recently discovered the same fandom.

your "past" isn't really anything special. every kid was bullied. i've known kids who were bullied constantly, and they get right back up. so why can't you? you ask for help, but you don't follow advice. FORGET THE PAST. just do it. it's seriously the only way. nothing else works, besides revenge (don't do that). live in the present. not the past. bullies aren't worth reminiscing about.

Listen to this person. That last sentence alone is pure gold. Focus on now rather than constantly reinforcing what the bullies said with negative self-talk.

And Mango was right about the prettiness thing, too. Very much so.

Being bullied can leave you in a pretty shitty position, mentally. But you can get out of it just with a bit of elbow grease and taking note of what support you have available to you, then using it.