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Disturbing dream

Are you dreaming of your crush, your significant other, your spouse, or your ex? Is your boyfriend/girlfriend cheating on you? Share your dream experience with others and what advice you have for those who are having such dreams.

Disturbing dream

Postby DoARealityCheck » Mon Jul 24, 2017 6:37 pm

I'm an 18 year old guy. I've had a lot of disturbing sex dreams but this one has been screwing with me all day. I know that it's not literal, thus the reason I'm here. It's worth noting I used to be addicted to porn, but have been off it (except pics of topless women from time to time and rarely "off the deep end" slip ups) for over a year. For purely academic purposes I'm going to go into uncomfortable detail. I don't really want to think of all the details but I know it'll give me better insight. Ok here goes.

My perspective was of a movie. I was watching a movie but it's all I could see,which I'm sure is a common thing in dreams. Watching from above, there were 2 children in a very dimly lit shower, obviously both naked. One boy, one girl. They were about 10. The girl was on her knees performing fellatio on the boy. He was very belittling in his speech (don't remember exactly what he said). And after a few seconds, the camera changed to a close up of the fellatio. The boy had a fully developed penis like that of an adult. I don't know if it was important, but his penis looked almost identical to mine (uncircumcised). Keep in mind this person was NOT me, I was watching this (remember, it's a movie) and could NOT feel the sexual pleasure, I can in other sex dreams, usually even if I'm not the one being touched. I didn't include that detail so you won't judge me, but for a better interpretation. After a moment, the boy orgasmed one, and only one "shot" and then the girl stopped. After a brief pause, she resumed fellatio and right away the boy had a full orgasm. The camera went back to the previous view. He was really angry and said something like "I only wanted a partial orgasm, (insert insulting word here)". The girl was clearly enjoying giving the fellatio, laughing, joking at his disappointment that she didn't stop. which is obviously really odd, and in the few other dreams I've had with young girls having sex they were in clear distress. This whole scene of the movie (everything I've typed so far) rewound and replayed once. The angry boy walked out of the bathroom while the girl remained in the shower, in a giggly mood. The room the boy walked out into was my parents room from real life. The house was exactly the same as my house in real life, but the master bathroom in my parents room (where the showering took place) couldn't have been more different than the one in real life. I know it's a long post, but please let me know what you think. What could this mean. The fellatio close up part of the dream was extremely vivid and detailed.
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Re: Disturbing dream

Postby TenderLC » Tue Jul 25, 2017 6:22 pm

Doarealitycheck,

Your dream is usually about the conflicts within yourself or else within your life arrangements. In the shower scene you may be working out either a past conflict from your childhood, or else you are working through the politics of your feelings of lack of control in emotional situations (the shower water means emotions) and I'm assuming that you were NOT into child porn, right? I hope not, but none-the-less, whether that is true or not, one issue in sex is trying to get from the activity what one wishes to obtain emotionally/socially/ psychologically, etc. The conflict between the two children is likely a conflict within you, trying to balance the demands and vulnerability of the boy with the control/lack of control of the girl. The girl seems to have the ability to go as far as she wants to, despite your feelings/need for control of yourself. And, she thinks that is funny. If these two are parts of yourself, then this shows the struggle you might have within yourself. This would mean that she seems to be the "Master of your domain" while your other half wants to be instead, but can't really compromise with the female half you your self. That is NOT an excuse to back-slide and return to your old ways, but you are almost recognizing what temptation might stem from. It makes me wonder though, what happened when you were younger, like maybe around ten years old?

Perhaps reviewing that in your mind before you sleep next time might produce more dreams that may help you. The other thing is what being in your parents bedroom/bathroom might infer. Are you looking for support from them(emotionally of course) or is that a little rebellion going on??? Or, is there restriction/friction/objection from the authorities in your life?

I hope this helps you, and i would like to know what you think of your dream after this interpretation? And best wishes on your healing.
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Re: Disturbing dream

Postby DoARealityCheck » Tue Jul 25, 2017 10:21 pm

I was NOT into child porn, ever. I have had the temptation but the very thought of it sickens me to the core (thus the topic title). Your post has given me a lot to think about. I don't know of any traumatic event around 10. I do know that's around the time I began viewing porn, and that as of lately my sexual feelings in general have been very erratic (could the act of sex in the dream be directly pointing toward this? I personally think not) I'll definitely think about this interpretation. Thank you.
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Re: Disturbing dream

Postby TenderLC » Wed Jul 26, 2017 3:29 pm

If looking at porn about the age of ten that led to your addiction isn't a form of trauma, then what could it be? The practice of using porn is said to lead to a very physical viewpoint of sex that seems to lead one away from the more emotional/social side of relations. Actually, the lack of social skills in dealing with the opposite gender may be what traps one into addiction because then the physical experience seems far more simple to obtain what satisfies the addiction, rather than going through the process of negotiating with an actual person.
I'm glad to hear that you were not into the child stuff. I wasn't accusing, just kind of asking for assurance.

It might be a great exercise for you to ask your self before anything else about a prospective Real Life partner: How do I know who she is, how do I know how she feels, How do I know what she considers proper/improper, what does she really want above all else, etc. All this rather than any sexual ideas. That would keep things on the relationship side, even in your dreams. Well, just an idea.
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Re: Disturbing dream

Postby DoARealityCheck » Wed Jul 26, 2017 10:59 pm

Thanks for responding again. I try my best not to objecty women. It's been a very long road learning to see them as people with real emotions rather than what my porn addicted brain wanted to see (objects of pleasure). I don't enjoy porn anymore to the point that if I see genitalia of either sex I cringe (because there's no emotional connection). I still have minor slips where I look at topless women fairly often. I do wonder why I'd have this dream only now though. Maybe it's because I've been slipping more than normal and my subconscious doesn't want me to relapse? Maybe that's why the movie rewound, the first time was representing my initial trauma (getting addicted) and then I relapsed (rewound) and this time I walk away angry that I still can't control it? Maybe? It may also explain why I walk into my real house, representing the present day and my current location? Maybe, maybe not. Either way you've really helped me understand what this may mean. If you have any more to add please do.
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