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Cannot Save My Childen From Dying/Injury - PLEASE HELP!!!!!

What dream horrors are haunting you in your sleep? Do you wake up sweating, screaming, or heart pounding? Share and cope with your own disturbing nightmares here.

Cannot Save My Childen From Dying/Injury - PLEASE HELP!!!!!

Postby JThomas242 » Tue Feb 14, 2012 8:47 am

I have been having several disturbing dreams lately about my children dying from injuries that I am incapable of saving them from. Please HELP me figure out why I am having these dreams so I can get some sleep!!! I am currenty like a walking zombie, getting no more than 4-5 hours of sleep each night!!!
Here is a short list of some of the most recent dreams:

(1) My son (3 1/2 years old) climbs up into a tree house that is 50 feet high in the air. He cannot get down and is screaming for help. I climb up to the tree house and just as a reach out to get him a board breaks and he falls through. I throw myself forward and catch him by the arm but am not strong enough and I eventually drop him. I hear him screaming "Mommy" as he falls to the ground and watch in horror and he hits the ground and 'explodes'.
**I also have an alternate version of the same dream where I carry my 8 month old daughter up into the treehouse with me as I try to save my son. After I drop my son and he is falling to his death I then accidentally drop my daughter and they both 'explode' on the ground.
(2) I sneak my 3 1/2 year old son onto an amusement park ride (one of those ships that swings back and forth and everntually goes all the way upside down). He is not big enough so when the ship goes upside down he slips out of the seat and starts to fall. I catch him and hold him by one hand. Again (just like in the first dream) I am not strong enough and I drop him. He falls and lands in the area that the ship passes through when it is right side up. I scream at him to get up and run away but he is hurt and cannot move. The ship goes back down to the area where my son is and crushes him. Again, I watch my son die and see him in pieces on the ground.
(3) I take my children to see the Niagara Falls for the first time. I have my daughter (8 months old) or my son (3 1/2 years old) up on my shoulders. I lean over so they can see how the water pours over the cliff and whichever child in on my shoulders falls down onto the rocks below and dies.
(4) I am playing with my children in the front yard with a small kick ball. One of us kicks the ball into the street and it falls into one the huge, open storm drains we actually have on the street. One of two things happens from here... (a) My son chases the ball, falls into the storm drain, and I hear him drown, or (b) I run after the ball with my daughter in my arms. I trip over my own feet and fall, causing me to drop my daughter. She then slids/rolls into the storm drain and dies.

**I am a 28 year old stay at home mother of two. I was a teacher until December of 2011, so staying home with my children is a recent change from teaching an anti-drug and bullying program part-time. I did have some issues conceiving (almost bled to death with a tubal pregnancy in January of 2010, lost my ability to have children due to tubal damage in March of 2010, and underwent IVF to have my daughter in September of 2010 which ended in miscarrying my daughter's twin). I am not sure if any of this is important information, but I really need some sleep and want to share whatever necessary so I can get some help!!!!
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Re: Cannot Save My Childen From Dying/Injury - PLEASE HELP!!

Postby Domswallow » Tue Feb 14, 2012 12:16 pm

Hi,
The dreams are about what is happening to you in your sleep. It is possible that the traumas you sufferd left you depressed. I don't know your financial situation, but not working is probably troubling you. A lot of negative thoughts intrude into your sleep and causing these disturbing dreams.
If you're taking any medicines or recriational drugs, they could cause the dreams. However, the nature of the dreams indicate some dizziness during the sleep. Your arms go numb every so often during sleep: "I throw myself forward and catch him by the arm", this indicates that you need to move your arm urgently! Here again: "I catch him and hold him by one hand" The dramatic nature of the dreams mean that you actually make the movements the dream suggest and experience pain in your arm. What do you do that would make your arms or hand hurt?
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Re: Cannot Save My Childen From Dying/Injury - PLEASE HELP!!

Postby foreverJung » Tue Feb 14, 2012 7:29 pm

apparently it's not uncommon for mothers to have anxiety dreams - perhaps you had similar dreams after the birth of your first child?

The first dream I think is the easiest to read and sort of encompasses the rest of the others. The tree house is childhood - you cannot reach your son there, as you try to reach him he falls to his death (as well as the sister in the other version). Both the waterfall and amusement park ride dreams illustrate actions that you would never do in your waking life because they are actions that are not grounded in the reality of the child's age and potential danger. Ultimately, I think your dreams reflect that you feel like you don't understand your children as children, that you're having trouble relating to them as children and this makes you profoundly anxious and worried (reflected by the horrific consequences in the dreams). The dreams may also subtly reflect that you miss being an adult without kids - you engage in relatively adult activities in the dreams (looking over a waterfall, the amusement park ride, playing around an open sewer), so the dreams may indicate that you are missing your adult time, but figuring out how to balance adult time with mommy time is a source of great stress.

Best wishes. Something you could try, before you go to bed ground your awareness in the reality that your babies exploding or being crushed to bits or anything similar is just too horrible to be real and if you see that you must be dreaming.
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Re: Cannot Save My Childen From Dying/Injury - PLEASE HELP!!

Postby JThomas242 » Wed Feb 15, 2012 6:17 pm

I truly appreciate the responses with all my heart! It has been truly terrible being unable to sleep because I continue waking up crying from these horrific dreams over and over again each night. It is funny that you mention missing my adult time, because that is something that I have been talking about with my husband recently and did not even realize the correlation. I am truly doing some serious soul-searching right now to figure out what it is that is bothering me so the dreams can stop, and I cannot thank you enough for helping to point me in the right direction. I love my children more than life itself, and that makes these dreams all the more terrifying and emotion-evoking.
Thank you again and hopefully the insight you have provided will allow me to get down to the root of the problem here, tackle it head-on, and get back to normal sleep once again! :)
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