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Recurring nightmare themes: killers and triumphs

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Recurring nightmare themes: killers and triumphs

Postby oneironovae » Fri Jan 11, 2019 1:46 am

Hello,

I've used the dream dictionary on this site for probably a decade at this point and have dissected my own dreams fairly successfully in that time. I've also been able to pick apart other people's dreams and have been able to give them some useful insight on the things they've experienced. But...I've been having some recurring dreams lately that are similar to what I used to have nightmares about, but now I'm actually getting to conclusions in my dreams unlike before. However, they keep happening and I'm not certain why I'm being subjected to this.

Some history: growing up, I used to have recurring nightmares of various things chasing me trying to kill me. It ranged anywhere from random monsters, to generic serial killers, to unknown forces, to...my father. For the longest time I didn't know why these kept happening. I finally realized as I grew up that they had to do with my turbulent relationship with my father and my fear in confronting him. When I finally put my foot down in my early 20s, the dreams seemed to stop. Then they started happening again a few years later, but this time instead of the dreams ending when the monster/creature/force/my father caught me and I knew death or harm was imminent, the dream would progress and I would resolve the scene by neutralizing the threat...usually by force. I'd always feel relieved and safer once I "won," but these dreams are so unlike anything I've experienced with recurring dreams. Instead of losing my voice, being captured and subdued, or murdered, I'm able to wriggle out of the clutches of my aggressor and either fight them back enough to escape and call the authorities, or kill them in self-defense. But I don't understand why.

The dream I had last night put me outside of my grandmother's old home. I've found myself in the backyard of her house in two different dreams now. If I remember correctly, both times I'm trying to evade capture by someone after me. In this particular dream, a man of unknown identity (I think he was supposed to be my stepfather in the dream, but my parents aren't divorced in real life) is chasing me after he has killed my grandmother in the dream (in real life, she's actually already passed away a couple years ago, and certainly not of murder.)

So, I run behind the back of the house with little time to get anywhere safe, so I hide beneath the skirting of the house (manufactured home with a bit of crawl-space beneath it for maintenance.) I duck under there and as the antagonist approaches, I notice my shoe is partially exposed. He grabs me and attempts to pull me out. Through the struggle, I sustain some damage (I don’t feel it as usual) but I manage to change the outcome and damage him enough to slow him, then shove him into what appears to be a trailer full of landscaping tools similar to what you’d find brought by a landscaping crew to do general maintenance on a yard. Kind of random, but I make use of what I’ve got nearby. As I run away from the trailer I’ve locked him in to put some distance between us—certain that he’ll find a way out somehow—I pull out my phone and begin to call 911 and I look for a place to hide out, or a vehicle to leave the area with. I think this is the point where the scene fades to a new one without complete resolution. I think he did manage to escape the trailer and begin pursuing me again, but I’ve reached a point where I feel I’m going to successfully get this handled.

One thing that dwells in my mind about this particular scene is that during the time I’m hidden under the house, I feel as if I myself am a man physically and mentally. Still my same age (mid-20s) but a man nonetheless. I’m technically born female in real life, but I have discovered recently that I am trans and socially transitioning to male, so I’m not certain if this has anything to do with current anxieties regarding that journey, but figured it could be beneficial to mention.

The next scene involves me being inside the house of my grandmother. I can’t tell if at this point I’m aware of what had just occurred outside or if this is one of those weird, surreal “multi-setting/scene” dream scenarios, but things are happening. It’s me, a few other people, and someone laying in my grandmother’s bed. For some reason, the house is full of puppies and kittens small enough to fit in the palm of your hand. And the other people are trying to kill them but never state why. I’m told to collect them all and kill them and instead of fighting them, I secretly collect all the animals and hide them away from the other people. The person laying in bed seems to be an older person and is regarded as the “boss” by the other people, and I recall having to carefully remove the puppies and kittens from the sheets to ensure their safety from these atrocious people. Needless to say, the whole situation is just bizarre and awful. At the end of this dream scene, I do feel fairly confident I saved most if not all of the very tiny animals’ lives.

I really don’t know what to make of these two dreams. I have a deep compassion for animals and the fact my mind would even subject me to anyone trying to bring harm to such innocent creatures makes me sick. In both dreams, I do exactly as I would in real life except for the last dream where it’s a bit different. I fight back my aggressor and escape to call emergency services in the first scene, and in the second scene I save all the animals. But, as for the second dream, if it were a real scenario, I would try to reason with the people to stop their actions against the animals. But, one thing I noticed about the second scenario, though, was despite the lack of dialogue, I felt an overwhelming feeling of having no choice but make it appear as if I’m completing their task, even though I’m actually going against them. It was a strange and complex scenario.

As I’m writing this, I’m currently unable to check dream meaning entries due to updates or something (receiving an error page) but even if I were able to search the entries, the fact I keep having recurring nightmares with a similar theme that I used to experience, but now with resolutions...is rather curious to me.

The vast majority of the time, even my bizarre dreams have some sort of meaning in some way, even if it’s only a little bit of the dream.

I’m interested to hear people’s thoughts and interpretations on the dream specifically or in general why this could be happening.

Thanks.
oneironovae
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