Dictionary:   A    B    C    D    E    F    G    H    I    J    K      M     N    O    P    Q    R    S    T    U     V    W    X    Y    Z

 

home   .   dream info   .   common dreams  dream dictionary  dream bank   site map   discussion forum  contact us

How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Need dating advice? Wanna talk about sex? Just broke up with your boyfriend? Complain about your ex? Jealousy ruining your relationship? Is he/she cheating? This is the forum to discuss and share your real life experiences.

How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby dreamerseeker » Thu Jun 29, 2017 3:11 am

I have a penpal that I have known for almost 6 months. We never met offline, but we both hope to one day.
I am 24 and he is 25 years old.

Recently, within the last month, he's been saying "I love you". He says he loves me because I am very kind and respectful.

CHANGES from when we first met until now that he says he "loves" me:
1. Before, he used to ALWAYS ask if we can video chat....He rarely asks anymore.
2. We used to text for hours and he was fast at responding.....Now, we takes forever to respond to my messages, and leaves messages hanging (he never says goodbye
anymore, just totally stops texting me).


What he does/says now:
1. (if I send him a nice pic of myself) He says "very nice".... He NEVER tells me I'm beautiful, gorgeous, etc..
2. He simply says "I love you"....he NEVER says how much he loves me.
3. I asked him what he did today out of friendly curiosity...From his response, I got the impression that that question annoyed him.
4. Sometimes I tell him "I'm sorry for bothering you"....And he ALWAYS tells me that I never bother him.



The other day he texted me, "I don't want to lose you" and "You will be happy with me, you will not regret.".....So does he love me?

He never had a girlfriend before and he says he is a shy person....So, is he too shy and inexperienced to express deep feelings for me?
Or does he not really love me that much?....How can I tell? If he DOES actually love me deeply, I don't want to break his heart for assuming he doesn't.
User avatar
dreamerseeker
Dream Seeker
Dream Seeker
 
Posts: 156
Joined: Sun Aug 04, 2013 2:44 am
Location: Boredomsville, USA

Re: How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby aussie_musician » Thu Jun 29, 2017 7:04 pm

where is the guy from ???

my advise to you .. is ..

leave him alone for at least one month ..

and see what his response is to that ..

whether you tell him that you need a month without him .. is your choice ..

and I think 6 months is too soon for a guy to tell a woman he loves her .. especially when they are pen-pals .. and .. when they haven't met in person yet ..


I do have "some" experience with this .. as I used to have pen-pals ..
WWJD.
Nehemiah 8:10 The Joy Of The Lord.
Ecclesiastes 3: 1-11 The Seasons Of Life.
"I am the way, the truth, and the life" - Jesus.
User avatar
aussie_musician
Dream Guru
Dream Guru
 
Posts: 6236
Joined: Thu Aug 15, 2013 12:36 am
Location: Newcastle, New South Wales, The East Coast Of Australia, Southern Hemisphere ..

Re: How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby dreamerseeker » Thu Jun 29, 2017 7:29 pm

My friend is from Algeria (North African country).

...And thank you very much for your advice. I was thinking the same thing too...to stop talking to him and wait for HIM to come to ME.

I've done that before and we only go 4 days without speaking and he texts me saying he "misses me."


It is so hard for me to tell whether he really wants me to be his girlfriend/future wife.... or if he is only playing me. :?
User avatar
dreamerseeker
Dream Seeker
Dream Seeker
 
Posts: 156
Joined: Sun Aug 04, 2013 2:44 am
Location: Boredomsville, USA

Re: How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby aussie_musician » Thu Jun 29, 2017 7:34 pm

Algeria ???

er ... not wanting to come across as "racist" ... and well actually .. I can't be racist for this comment .. but ...


perhaps consider .. ending the correspondence ...

I say that ... and read this carefully .. because of scamming ...

be absolutely careful ...


the guy could well be .. a great guy to correspond with .. but ... on the flip side .. be careful ...


then again .. I could be wrong about Algeria and scamming ....
WWJD.
Nehemiah 8:10 The Joy Of The Lord.
Ecclesiastes 3: 1-11 The Seasons Of Life.
"I am the way, the truth, and the life" - Jesus.
User avatar
aussie_musician
Dream Guru
Dream Guru
 
Posts: 6236
Joined: Thu Aug 15, 2013 12:36 am
Location: Newcastle, New South Wales, The East Coast Of Australia, Southern Hemisphere ..

Re: How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby VenusInChains » Thu Jun 29, 2017 11:39 pm

Ok just by reading your original post, gave me the impression that there was a communication barrier and perhaps English is not his first language. Upon reading further responses by you and aussie_musician, I can only hope that you didn't fall for some sort of catfishing scam by sending this person any amount of money. It's a very common thing and I know a few people personally who have fallen for it.

All that aside(if this not a scam) I think online dating is tricky, you miss out on the physical stuff. You mention having plans to meet in person, is he coming to you or are you going to him? Are there dates set yet?

I think you should ask yourself if you are happy? If the answer is no, then it's ok to break up. Never mind worrying about breaking his heart because he doesn't want to lose you. If he says that often, it's kinda manipulating you to feel guilt for wanting to exit the relationship. Don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm.
Oh well
Whatever
Never mind
User avatar
VenusInChains
Out Of This World
Out Of This World
 
Posts: 1732
Joined: Sun Feb 20, 2011 7:53 pm
Location: Elsewhere

Re: How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby dreamerseeker » Fri Jun 30, 2017 4:10 am

A scam?....

I don't know about that. If it is a scam, what is he getting out of it?

No, I did not send him any money whatsoever, if fact, HE at one point last month tried to send me money because I told him I may need to take a break from college because I keep getting turned down on loans, can't afford my tuition, etc.... I refused his offer on sending me money, but he said he wants to help and I told him I needed about $30,000(USD) and he said that was too much money and that he is sorry he can't help.....so....I don't think he 's scamming for money.


He is a Muslim...(Please do not assume anything bad). He texted me one day and said he is mad at his brother for getting into a fight with someone. He HATES violence....I am sure of that just by the way he was texting me about his brother.

Also, I don't think he is scamming for anything sexual....he hasn't really mentioned anything like that.
Once, he told me he had a dream about me but he was too shy to tell me, I basically pried it out of him and he said he had a dream that we were married and I cheated on him.

He doesn't even swear....Out of the 6 months I've known him, not once has he said a single foul/cuss word.


VenusInChains,
You're right, English is not his first language...He speaks Arabic, but his English is surprisingly good. He texts me with no problems and I can understand him, and he responds to my messages like he understands what I tell him.

When we first met on a Pen-Pal website, he was actually what I would call "annoying"....I at the time, had no feelings at all for him, and he would ask the 50-questions game, "what's your favorite food, favorite music, any pets, have you ever been here and there, etc.." And we would exchange music videos from youtube back and forth to each other. He would send me about 30 videos, one after another, of his favorite Algerian music. This went on nearly every day for 4 months! Now like I said, within the last month he has been telling me he loves me and wants me to give him a chance.

Also, no dates yet. I'm waiting until at least next June (of 2018) when I finish college. Then I will think about making an arrangement to go there to meet him. He knows I want to wait until next year and he said he respects that. He told me he can't wait and that he is impatient to meet me.
User avatar
dreamerseeker
Dream Seeker
Dream Seeker
 
Posts: 156
Joined: Sun Aug 04, 2013 2:44 am
Location: Boredomsville, USA

Re: How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby VenusInChains » Fri Jun 30, 2017 5:50 am

I have nothing against Muslims, I have friends and family that practice so I may have less bias than others here. There are things that you would need to consider when marrying a Muslim (assuming you get that far). Having dated a Muslim, I was pestered into converting. It was the breaking point of our relationship because our spiritual beliefs made us incompatible.
A Muslim man can marry a Christian or a Jewish woman, so converting may not be an issue for you. Some people convert to appease their partner, but it isn't just saying your are a Muslim, it's a change in lifestyle. Are you able to give up eating bacon, drinking alcohol and going swimming in public? If you ever had kids with this man, it would be required by him that they are raised muslim, even if you remained Christian or Jewish. There isn't a lot of room to compromise on these things as Islam tends to favour the man over the woman, and there would be a lot of pressure coming from his family if he chose to do things that didn't align with his faith.
Last edited by VenusInChains on Sun Jul 09, 2017 3:55 am, edited 1 time in total.
Oh well
Whatever
Never mind
User avatar
VenusInChains
Out Of This World
Out Of This World
 
Posts: 1732
Joined: Sun Feb 20, 2011 7:53 pm
Location: Elsewhere

Re: How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby aussie_musician » Sun Jul 02, 2017 6:46 pm

i'm just saying .. to be careful .. in case he does attempt to scam you ..

not saying he will ..

as for him being a muslim .. yeah well ..
WWJD.
Nehemiah 8:10 The Joy Of The Lord.
Ecclesiastes 3: 1-11 The Seasons Of Life.
"I am the way, the truth, and the life" - Jesus.
User avatar
aussie_musician
Dream Guru
Dream Guru
 
Posts: 6236
Joined: Thu Aug 15, 2013 12:36 am
Location: Newcastle, New South Wales, The East Coast Of Australia, Southern Hemisphere ..

Re: How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby Jezzabella » Mon Jul 03, 2017 6:33 am

That is not love, that's infatuation.
Image

My image is beautiful. The only problem is your view.
It's my mouth I can say what I want to.
User avatar
Jezzabella
Dream Seeker
Dream Seeker
 
Posts: 156
Joined: Sat Jun 28, 2014 2:36 am

Re: How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby dreamerseeker » Tue Jul 04, 2017 5:35 am

Thanks anyway for your guys' semi-help here.

Jezzabella,
I was thinking that too...but it is hard to tell right now. What if he really does love me and he is just too shy and inexperienced (cuz he never had a girlfriend before) to convince me that it is true love? I mean we've known each other for 6 months now....I know that may or may not be a long time....but it's not like he just met me yesterday and is already saying he 'loves" me....

Thank you anyway for your help.
User avatar
dreamerseeker
Dream Seeker
Dream Seeker
 
Posts: 156
Joined: Sun Aug 04, 2013 2:44 am
Location: Boredomsville, USA

Re: How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby Xwikki » Thu Jul 13, 2017 5:23 am

If someone truly loves you then they care about and support what makes you happy, even if what makes you happy isn't being with them.
Xwikki
Dream Moods Queen 2011 - Going Dark
Dream Moods Queen 2011 - Going Dark
 
Posts: 11368
Joined: Fri Dec 11, 2009 5:12 pm
Location: England

Re: How to tell if someone truly loves you deeply?

Postby Sheena » Mon Sep 04, 2017 2:01 pm

If you feel it within you are beloved.
If not, no words or gestures matter.
Sheena
Dream Guru
Dream Guru
 
Posts: 8785
Joined: Sun Jun 06, 2010 2:14 pm


Return to Dating And Love Relationships Advice

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests

Shared Bottom Border