Penny for your thoughts?

by **Phoenix** on Sat Apr 11, 2009 8:07 pm

well my brain needs to completely wake up and I need to be motivated to work too. I am sadly lacking in motivation at the moment. sigh.

by **puppyjill** on Sat Apr 11, 2009 8:10 pm

i know exactly how you feel.

by **Phoenix** on Sat Apr 11, 2009 9:23 pm

Heh I think tonight has potential to be a really wild ride

by **puppyjill** on Sat Apr 11, 2009 10:03 pm

lucky you. i want a peice too.

by **Phoenix** on Sat Apr 11, 2009 10:11 pm

"I think I may have been too optimistic in my thoughts," I say as I look at my still silent phone. I think I am starting to feel some motivation to work on my book.

by **cindrella** on Sun Apr 12, 2009 3:42 am

let him ignore me, i am going to leave him alone for few days.. let him think about me how he will feel if i am not there???.. some times i always make him feel that i am there for him and disturb him always. may be he does want to leave him alone. i am going to do that. i am going to leave him alone. i wont call up for few days, may be a week or two, yes that will be quite a long time for him. if he does feel he is happy without me or he does not feel any diference, i think he would not come back and move on.... if he feels for me badly, he would definitely come back then he loves me as i do. If he does not come back then he does not deserve my love and does not worth for it

. then what is the next step

i pray silently asking god to give me strength to come over my difficulties and my soul says he would help in that.

i am now thinking about what i would plan for today. i have lot of money now

but i want to spend it in a useful and good way, give some for charity as i could i can. Go for a shopping :excited:

, buying some books, so sunny here to go out and looking for the evening for shopping. But for shopping or anything, i would usually search and search til i get a "perfect one" that satisfies me. So i think the time is not enough for me. I pray god that he give me time to do what ever i want. :balloons:

by **MandaPantz13** on Sun Apr 12, 2009 7:12 am

I knwo what u mean cinder...you want to give them time to miss you..but are scared in case they dont

my prob is even if i do give him time...hes too wrapped up in all the available chicks who are so willing to throw themselves at him...he could distract himself if he wanted (hes way too sexy to be left alone hehe) ) my friend when she broke up with her bf, made sure he was always thinking of her and he came back, not like obviously but subtley (not exactly sure how) but made sure he didnt have time to forget her cos guys work diff then chicks.
Personally im writing mine a letter...saying how i feel and everythig that i cant say to his face (either cos im scared or cos he changes the topic he hates that he hurt me) and ive explained its not to make him feel guilt its in hoeps that by helping him understand how i feel i can heal. i havent sent it yet cos easter n all but i will tues.

P.S happy easter to all those who celebrate it! :cupcake:

(<its an easter egg for now)

by **cindrella** on Sun Apr 12, 2009 12:56 pm

yes manda, but here he loves his parents more and he obeys them to marry some one. That is what worries me. Whatever chicks come Manda we are ideal in our own way, no one can replace us. I believe in that. I worry becoz his parents will change his mind. No words to explain how i feel now. writting a letter describing our feelings is a good way. I used to write 100s of texting messages to him whatever i feel in my mind that i want to express. the very difficult thing is that i keep smiling outside even though i have a heavy heart.

by **MandaPantz13** on Sun Apr 12, 2009 9:56 pm

thats sad, and yeh i know im one of a kind etc etc but i also know how we perfectly balance each other, let each other have fun but settle each other at the same time (if that makes sense) so i wrote him a letter tot ell him how he made me feel when we were together. I find it hard in messages, he hasnt been replying latley and im not sure why. Oh well that will happen, will happen. Hopefully cinder the guy will realise what a wonderful beautiful person you truely are and learn that although his parents opinions are important and its nice he respects them, he needs to realise its his life and he has to do what makes him happy, not what makes everyone else happy. My parents didnt like my ex either in fact they banned him from the house at one stage :lol:

but everyone is different

by **cindrella** on Mon Apr 13, 2009 2:55 am

MandaPantz13 wrote:thats sad, and yeh i know im one of a kind etc etc but i also know how we perfectly balance each other, let each other have fun but settle each other at the same time (if that makes sense) so i wrote him a letter tot ell him how he made me feel when we were together. I find it hard in messages, he hasnt been replying latley and im not sure why. Oh well that will happen, will happen. Hopefully cinder the guy will realise what a wonderful beautiful person you truely are and learn that although his parents opinions are important and its nice he respects them, he needs to realise its his life and he has to do what makes him happy, not what makes everyone else happy. My parents didnt like my ex either in fact they banned him from the house at one stage but everyone is different

i dont look for replies manda, i would send so many messages and i just want him to read it and know how i am feeling. So dont bother about replies, they dont do it either and men are like that, they do all sorts of things to attract us initially and they stop after that as far as i know. Messaging is a better way to communicate and it tells how we feel for them and helps to keep in touch even if we dont call or see them. It would work good, and it is the way of showing our love and longingness for them. i know, to be liked by everyone is not easy.

i feel like if this fails, i am not going to trust any men in my life.., not any ONE

by **MandaPantz13** on Mon Apr 13, 2009 8:55 am

lol i know its good he knows how im feeling but i dont want to bombard him cos he is the sort of person who doesnt like to be chased...he likes the ones he has to chase (thast how he got me in the first place) so im owrried if i txt him whenever i feel something hes gonna be like damn stop stalking me b*tch!! lol. so i figured a letter, cos its personal and he can relate to it and stuff, plus its hand written so he can sorta see me.

by **puppyjill** on Mon Apr 13, 2009 11:15 am

manda sweety a man worth your time is a man who gives just as much as he takes. you shouldnt be chaseing enyone nor should he. it should be time spent wanting to be with eachother. not playing a highschool games like a carrot on a string. he should want you as much as you want him, otherwise hes no good let him hurt someone else. i dont want you to get hurt sweety love pup

by **Phoenix** on Mon Apr 13, 2009 7:33 pm

Don't keep texting if he doesnt respond- cause it just makes you look desperate. Despite the fact that all you want to do is hear their sexy voice again... especially when he talks dirty to you ::giggles:::

Be patient- I know, easier said than done, but if he deserves you then he will treat you right. And if he's really into you then he will communicate with you.

:blowingkisses:

love ya babe!

by **cindrella** on Tue Apr 14, 2009 1:31 am

i am just thinking how i was before i met him or loved him. I was just crushing around, not involving with any mutual love. Now after i started love him, at the beginning, no words to describe how i was happy but now everything seems to be reversed. i dont get sleep properly, i do want to forget him but some or other thing makes me remember. Yesterday, i was shopping and that pleasant perfume smell, that he used to wear, brought back the memories about our love. It does make a huge difference before the experience of sex and after having it.. can i now go back to the stage as i was before

never i can

by **MandaPantz13** on Tue Apr 14, 2009 2:47 am

Jill...i meant like the only reason he chased me in the firts place...well ill tell u the story...i was really drunnk and iin town clubbing and having a bad night (had fights etc) and my mate introduced me to him and i didnt even see him i was like hi and walked away. he was like man she's fiesty i have to get to know her!! and so when i came up to visit my sister (and i seen him and was like wow) the rest is history!! yay i dont member meeting him drunk. yeh i havent txted him but i did send the letter and his stuff back today...so there r no reminders of him in my room anymore

U guys are great im really glad i found this website..and im osrry its liek the only thing i talk about is him so i really apprecitae u guys lvoe u all :blowingkisses:

by **Lillith** on Tue Apr 14, 2009 3:19 am

Do we see film first, then lunch or lunch then film??????????

Mmmmmmmmmmmm, if we do lunch first then it will save me spending a load on rubbish that'll just make them hyper for the rest of the day :roll:

by **puppyjill** on Tue Apr 14, 2009 8:36 am

manda sweety your probably very pretty and dont take this the wrong way but he just wanted to see how far he could get with you. thats all most guys want. COME HERE TO NY ill introduce to some really hot nice guys that will spoil you>

by **MandaPantz13** on Tue Apr 14, 2009 8:45 am

puppyjill wrote:manda sweety your probably very pretty and dont take this the wrong way but he just wanted to see how far he could get with you. thats all most guys want. COME HERE TO NY ill introduce to some really hot nice guys that will spoil you>

do u actually realise how patronizing this post sounds?? i know u dont mean offence but i think i can tell the difference between someone loving me and someone wanting me for sex! you dont date someone for 5 months and call them beautiful every single day and drive an hr to see them every chance u get 'just to see how far u can get with them' i know he did love me, i just dont understand how that changed.

by **puppyjill** on Tue Apr 14, 2009 9:13 am

how old is he? when i was younger i had guys do the same for me to. and when i didnt put out they left or stopped calling. guys can be fucked up an selfish. all we want to do is love them an all they want is sex. but the quicker you can at least see it alittle that way the less we get hurt because you cover your ass. you know how much of your self to give.

by **MandaPantz13** on Tue Apr 14, 2009 9:29 pm

Granted he is young...he is the same age as me (19) and while i get that most guys at that age CAN (and i know ones who have) fake entire relationships just to have some steady sex. it wasnt like that at all with us. It wasnt all about the sex at all. in fact most nights we just sat n talked n cuddeled rather than making love all night. I know him fairly well, and in the entire time i've known him he has never been the one to go out n pick up random chicks. So i think its a rather broad generalisation u are making, when u dont know him, me and dont even live in the same country, im sorry guys have treated u like shit. But dont take away from me the happy memories i have of my only wonderful relationship. I know when im being used.

by **puppyjill** on Tue Apr 14, 2009 10:07 pm

sweety no one is takeing enything from you. an the whole reason for posting on dm is to get feedback to each their own sweety but i know at that age i didnt know half as much as ido now. now im married fo 15 years an dwe have a 10 year old son who is fighting leukemia, diabetes an ADHD. so do what ever you feel is right. good luck honey.

by **MandaPantz13** on Wed Apr 15, 2009 12:03 am

puppyjill wrote:sweety no one is takeing enything from you. an the whole reason for posting on dm is to get feedback to each their own sweety but i know at that age i didnt know half as much as ido now. now im married fo 15 years an dwe have a 10 year old son who is fighting leukemia, diabetes an ADHD. so do what ever you feel is right. good luck honey.

but ur saying like he only wanted me for sex! its not how it was. and this forum is about getting my thoughts out of my head. u can have ur oppinion, but dont try to be like wat happened to u is what will happen to me.

by **cindrella** on Wed Apr 15, 2009 12:16 am

manda see whether he is having any other problems or stress going on at present.. may be job or family problems like that... may be he is concentrating on those and dont find time for you.

i know there are guys who would look only for sex, and we could easily identify them. some guys would directly tell what they wish and others dont. :evil:

i dont keep them even as my friends.

the one who really loves will tell at the beginning "i love you and i want to marry you" and few of them have told this to me when i was in my college days. But my man has not told this to me, so it does not mean he does not love me, ours is mutual one. he lot differs from others, may be that attracted me.

it is irony in my love, he dont use to give any gifts and i just have only his memories and happy moments that i shared with him and i believe i wont have that satisfaction with any other men in this world

True love will never die :blowingkisses:

by **MandaPantz13** on Wed Apr 15, 2009 1:40 am

Yeh i know hes having personal issues and because we were so serious (we were moving in together) i know it scared him a bit so when we broke up i thought it was kinda a phase thing. i dunno when i talk to him he seems as confused as i am :S ah well time will tell. like i used to say to my friends, i dont know if we were meant to be together forever or not but i do know this wasnt the time its meant to end, this isnt right. ah well time will tell. in the mean time im going to have a drink ....cheers :cheers:

by **Lillith** on Wed Apr 15, 2009 1:22 pm

Where you gone american boy????????????????????

:blowingkisses:

by **puppyjill** on Thu Apr 16, 2009 7:42 pm

manda i hope an wish you all the best.

by **MandaPantz13** on Thu Apr 16, 2009 10:42 pm

puppyjill wrote::) manda i hope an wish you all the best.

thanks, and im sorry for getting shirty with u its just a sensitive topic for me

My thoughts are now all focused on tomorrow and how much i wish it would hurry up n get here so i can see my beautiful big sister

by **puppyjill** on Fri Apr 17, 2009 7:04 am

i understand sweety an its ok. go a love your sister because blood is thicker then water.

by **MandaPantz13** on Sat Apr 18, 2009 10:27 pm

my thoughts are clouded by a haze of hangover...ugh but i had an awesome!!! night :cabbagepatch:

by **Lillith** on Sun Apr 19, 2009 3:51 am

by **Pyrocensored** on Mon Apr 20, 2009 4:29 pm

Well,

I just got back from NY, and its been a fairly nice week. Normally I go up there, and theres no color... just many different shades of gray...

This week there was some blue in the sky, and the temperature was actually quite nice...
_____

Anyways, When I came back, my grandfather gave me his old Army Air Corps (airforce) uniform. All brown, and with the old Master Sergeant rank. He first got it back in 1943, and it is still in perfect condition, exept for that a button popped off (which I still have, and intend to sew it back on). Also, he gave me an old army jacket, with REAL OLD tech sergeant ranks on them (now Sergeant First Class, with 3 up and 2 down).

Anyways, all these details may mean nothing to yall, but I was absolutely shocked when he handed them down to me.

_____

Later that evening, my family suggested that I tried the uniform on. I was even more shocked to find out that we were the EXACT same size at around that age... Not even any of my uniforms NOW fit me that well!

Anyways, Thats been the highlight of my week... The ten hour drive back sucked... really... really... bad.

Hope everyone else is doing well!

by **Phoenix** on Mon Apr 20, 2009 8:03 pm

I have an interview for a full ride scholarship on Wednesday. ::breathe phoenix, breathe!!:: It was originally scheduled for thursday and the date just got changed. I hope i get it!!

by **puppyjill** on Mon Apr 20, 2009 8:12 pm

i hope you do get it phoe. that would be huge for you.

by **Phoenix** on Mon Apr 20, 2009 8:15 pm

what would be cool is if i was offered a full ride scholarship at both the schools i applied to- then my parents could really eat their words when they said i was too dumb for college lol!!

by **MandaPantz13** on Mon Apr 20, 2009 11:00 pm

jhaha good luck phoenix!!!! You deserve it!

my thoughts r all muddled. I thought all i wanted was to fall out of love with him and to forget that i ever loved him. But now as i cant contact him and im slowly forgetting his face i realise i am geting wat i wanted and am starting to fall out of love with him. I dont like it, it scares me. strange......

by **puppyjill** on Tue Apr 21, 2009 8:45 am

Phoenix wrote:what would be cool is if i was offered a full ride scholarship at both the schools i applied to- then my parents could really eat their words when they said i was too dumb for college lol!!

WHAT! thats fucked up phoe, why in gods good green earth would they tell you that? im sorry but even parents who really feel that way should support their child in what ever they choose to do! AN NEVER tell them their not smart enough for college! sorry phoe thats just mean. you are smart an you wiil excell no matter what enyone says including your parents. so fill your brain an graduate sweety an do it for yourself not because their asses.

by **Phoenix** on Tue Apr 21, 2009 7:37 pm

Oh I'm doing it for myself, believe me- the ultimate "eff-off" to my parents is just a side benefit.

by **Pyrocensored** on Tue Apr 21, 2009 8:17 pm

Phoenix wrote:I have an interview for a full ride scholarship on Wednesday. ::breathe phoenix, breathe!!:: It was originally scheduled for thursday and the date just got changed. I hope i get it!!

zomg congratulations...

Just dont freak out. Also dont wear a white shirt... You'll collect sooo many stains... @.@

And show a little cleavage too. It MAY work for you. It didnt work all so well for me... Especially when you "accidentally drop your pen" so you bent over to pick it up, and "accidentally" fall and unzip the guy's zipper, and try to "convince" him to give you the scholarship.

(not that ive tried or anything)

(and im not saying it'll work either)

by **MandaPantz13** on Tue Apr 21, 2009 11:56 pm

HAHAHAHAHAHA that funny!! :rofl:

Good luck Phoenix, let us know how u did.

by **SmilesnTears** on Wed Apr 22, 2009 5:31 pm

I'm think'n about how much money it would cost to get a kitty tail and kitty ears, like to attach to my hat and jeans!

by **Phoenix** on Thu Apr 23, 2009 10:20 pm

I will find out tomorrow if i get the scholarship or not but I kicked butt at the interview and I have a 50/50 chance.

by **MandaPantz13** on Thu Apr 23, 2009 10:23 pm

Whooo!!! *fingers crossed*

by **Phoenix** on Thu Apr 23, 2009 10:25 pm

heh I just applied for another full ride scholarship today too

by **Pyrocensored** on Fri Apr 24, 2009 9:39 pm

Well, you deserve it, girl...

Im sure you can generously issue an ass whipping upon them.
______________

anyways, penny for my thoughts... im wondering wtf a "puffy milk doll" means...

A Marine corps Master Sergeant was watching this fat kid continuosly fuck up rifle drill. Eventually, he got fed up with it, and went on this rant of how the fuck he probably ways 450 G.D. pounds, and Why the fuck cant he handle eight more (as in the rifle)? It was probably the average size of one of his meals.

He said:

MSGT: "You know what, son? you aint nothin but a godamn fucked up puffy milk doll! Youve got 3 fucking seconds to to straighten your ass up, or you will be running for the next few day with my foot in your ass!"

[Turns, goes to a cadet nearby]

"what, you eyin me with them baby blues, son?

CADET: "no sir!"

MSGT: "What about no sir? I dont know what the hell your talking about if you dont repeat the fucking question!"

CADET: "I was not eying you sir!"

MSGT: "YOU?!? YOU?!? You know what a ewe IS?!? A ewe is a female sheep!!! A female sheep is for FUCKING!!! Why would you want to fuck your marine instructor?"
____________

It was at this point I had to hide behind a table because I was laughing so hard I could barely stand up.

by **Phoenix** on Mon Apr 27, 2009 11:59 pm

Oh Pyro that is soooo funny. I am ROFLMAO and i needed it, cause i found out that i didnt get the scholarship today. well fuck em cause they werent my first choice anyways.

by **loved22** on Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:49 am

Thinking about all those people who have lost thier lives

by **DanielleNicole00** on Sat Jun 20, 2009 12:41 am

I'm thinking about my cinnamon roll and how good its going to taste once I put it in my microwave.

by **Lillith** on Mon Jun 22, 2009 10:12 am

I missed being on here....................................

by **Phoenix** on Tue Jun 23, 2009 3:12 pm

oh lilith, where have you been? we missed you

by **puppyjill** on Wed Jun 24, 2009 8:51 am

im thinking about my family an hopeing that theres a tomorrow?